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Author
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Topic: Has anyone seen this man?
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Dwayne Caldwell
Master Film Handler
![](http://www.film-tech.com/ubbmembers/417.jpg)
Posts: 323
From: Rockwall, TX, USA
Registered: Apr 2000
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posted 04-25-2000 03:47 AM
HAS ANYONE SEEN THIS MAN? From the Association Press wire John P. Pytlak, resident Mr.Film-Know-It-All of the Eastman Kodak company has been reported missing from his world wide web home at the Film-Tech Forums for the last five days. Members and visitors of this internet forum have been without his vast expertise and knowledge for the entire weekend. Last seen at the thread titled "Capital Improvements" on April 19th at 10:23 AM central standard time, Mr.Pytlak has not been seen nor heard from since. Film-Tech employees speculate the National Security Agency (NSA) has apprehended this man, and perhaps his immediate family."We just don't know where he is," claims former Film-Tech tech Jeremy Spracklen. "One minute the forum members were talking about some super incredible CAP code and the next minute he is just gone! It's like he suddenly never existed." Other members of Film-Tech are equally concerned. Dwayne Caldwell, a current Film-Tech tech says, "I was just joking about that NSA remark. People joke around on the forum all the time. I'm telling you, Valenti is behind this. He has no sense of humor. He must've thought John would spill the beans. All people wanted was a demonstration. No one asked Mr.Pytlak to give away how it actually worked." Jack Valenti is the head of the Motion Picture Association of America (MPAA) and is dedicated to tracking down video pirates. While some believe this is an abduction of the NSA at the demand of the MPAA, others believe the FBI may in some way be behind Mr.Pytlak's mysterious disappearance. "The whole thing is simply bizarre," claims Internet Police Chief Wiggams. "At first, we figured Mr.Pytlak simply logged off. Now after extensively tracking his IP numbers, we feel something outside of cyberspace may have happened. Something real life. We're currently hacking into the FBI's database to perform searches for Mr.Pytlak, because we cannot break into the NSA's database due to their CAP code encryption. Thus far, the only links that have appeared point to porno sites. That's always the case. I mean how do those porno sites link everything to them? How can you type in the word 'apple' and turn up over a hundred matches which only link you to adult sites? It's really annoying when we're trying to...." (cut off due to ranting) Brad Miller, president of Film-Tech also believes in the NSA theory. "Recently there has been a lengthy thread on the CAP code at the forum. Claims were made by John (Pytlak) that this CAP code was capable of tracking any bootlegged videotape to the print source. Such an achievement would be near impossible without some form of noticeable on screen mark. I personally don't buy it and asked for proof via a demonstration. After that request, he vanished." At first, Mr.Pytlak dodged the demonstration questions. 24 hours later, he disappeared. Police have no leads. "If we don't hear something by the end of the week," says Dwayne Caldwell, "we're going after Valenti. Film-Tech members should not have to go without Mr.Pytlak's expertise for such an extended period of time. If indeed Valenti is behind this, he can expect to be hanged with a stretch of unbreakable Kodak Vision polyester film. It's what John would have wanted."
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John Pytlak
Film God
![](http://www.film-tech.com/ubbmembers/331cap.gif)
Posts: 9987
From: Rochester, NY 14650-1922
Registered: Jan 2000
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posted 04-25-2000 11:33 AM
I'M BACK!!! ![](http://www.film-tech.com/ubb2/smile.gif) It was like something from the X-Files. Here I was sitting at my keyboard at work, about to answer Brad's very specific questions about CAP Code. There was a knock at the door, and I recall a strange sweet smell (kind of like splicing cement), then nothing... I woke this morning, still at my desk. My family has no memory of the weekend either, only the strange sweet smell before oblivion. Other than the postings on Film-Tech, I can't recall anything else about CAP Code, and can't find any record of it in my files. Is it simple coincidence that my five-day disappearance overlapped the Easter weekend??? Was this the work of a government agency or some right-wing religious cult??? Am I a doppleganger??? What was that sweet smell??? Stay tuned... ![](http://www.film-tech.com/ubb2/wink.gif) ------------------ John P. Pytlak, Senior Technical Specialist Worldwide Technical Services, Entertainment Imaging Eastman Kodak Company Research Labs, Building 69, Room 7419 Rochester, New York, 14650-1922 USA Tel: 716-477-5325 Fax: 716-722-7243 E-Mail: john.pytlak@kodak.com
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