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Author
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Topic: Piglet's Big Movie
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Brad Miller
Administrator
Posts: 17775
From: Plano, TX (36.2 miles NW of Rockwall)
Registered: May 99
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posted 03-21-2003 03:43 PM
Yes, I know this is a G rated movie intended for kids, but...
What an effing piece of shit! I would never subject my kids to crap like this. Could they possibly have made it more boring? Did anyone else get a craving for piglet pork chops during the show? Here are a bunch of animals with no life and hardly any brains. Just watch Winnie the Poo and Pigvomit try and build a house for the donkey. It's a bunch of sticks leaning on each other. Then we find out that the donkey built the exact same house elsewhere, because he is also too stupid to build a house even half-assed properly. However Poo boy lives in a nice house, but apparently these sticks are good enough for the donkey that he calls his "friend". Yeah ok, let's teach the kiddies that it is ok to shaft your "friends" with a shitty house so long as you are comfy. And no feline springs around on his tail! Stupid, stupid, stupid.
They spend the entire movie looking for the lost Pigvomit by reading his scrapbook of memories, and when they lose the book they think his memories are floating down the river. Durp! Yeah, like Pigvomit won't continue to remember them (or are pigs really that dumb?) Anyway, who goes sleuthing merely by looking through a scrapbook. Idiots!!! This whole movie looked to me like one of those rip-off sitcoms on tv where they have everyone sit around, roll a couple of minutes worth of new footage as everyone "reminisces" of past shows, use old clips from old shows, and then they call this one a new show. Well, maybe this movie was 100% all new stories, but it sure looked to me like Disney just grabbed some old footage out of storage and animated a few minutes so they could release a new movie and cash in.
And what's with the dude with the overbite at the end singing his sappy lame 60's sounding songs while playing his guitar in the woods? I'll bet Disney threw this whole thing together to rake in at the box office and then on top of that sell some albums. Greedy bastards!
If the whole thing weren't so wimpy, overly sweet and straight out of the 60's I suppose I could have tolerated it. As it is, the sappy sweetness of the movie made me want to beat someone when it was over to make up for it. Whoever was responsible for making this movie, if I ever meet you prepare to be slapped.
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