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Author
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Topic: rant on SMELLY customers
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Melanie Loggins
Expert Film Handler
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Posts: 154
From: Wayne, NE, USA
Registered: Aug 2011
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posted 08-18-2016 09:58 AM
We have these two customers... It is probably a son (aged 30sish?) and his mother (50sish?) but one of our deepest collective fears is that they're dating.
Anyway. He is phsyically repellent. He is a tall guy, big belly, jacked dirty teeth, thick curly black hair that is receding in the front but about to his shoulders in back. He has a thick beard that goes almost down to his chest. He has the worst eczema or dandruff I have ever seen. He has flaky patches around the hairline and it falls into his beard. He sometimes also has bits of food in his beard. They ALWAYS wear the same clothes, which are discolored from sweat and frequent wearing. They smell horrible. Like, standing on the other side of the counter from them to take their order, I sometimes feel a little sick from the smell. They take an interminable amount of time putting salt and flavor on their popcorn, often bringing the line to a halt because nobody can move until they're done, and the customers unfortunate enough to be behind them always make frantic eye contact with me, like, um wtf is going on here?!? When they leave the lobby and go into the theatre, the smell lingers for 5 to 10 minutes if we don't rush out and (surreptitiously) spray Lysol behind them.
Every time they finally move into the theatre I just think, man, and some of our customers are going to have to sit near that for two hours? That hardly seems fair! But... what can we do? They pay their money just like everyone else. When he leaves he usually has popcorn in his beard. He goes into the restroom for a while and we actually have to make sure he's out before we lock the door. When the house is clear, we spray more Lysol all around where they were sitting to help remove the stench from the seats.
(The best part is that they've been coming every weekend lately and they're feeling a little more comfortable to talk, and she randomly, without irony or sarcasm, showed me the ghost-finder app on her phone and pointed to an empty corner of the lobby and said, "There's one. It says 'the architect'." I just thought, oh sweet mercy, please stop talking and move away from me!)
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Randy Stankey
Film God
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Posts: 6539
From: Erie, Pennsylvania
Registered: Jun 99
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posted 08-18-2016 01:44 PM
Years ago, before he died, my Father-in-Law, George, was one of those "smelly old men." He was 90 years old. He had a boat load of money in the bank and he thought he was exempt from having to take a shower because he was rich.
Whenever my wife (now ex-wife) went to visit him, he always wanted to go to lunch at Ponderosa. Of course, he needed to use every discount card and coupon that he could. It probably took five extra minutes while he haggled for every penny he could. All the while, everybody in line, myself included, had to endure his urine tinged body odor. Like you said, it lingered, too.
Finally, it got so bad that the manager came over to tell George that people were complaining and that he needed to take a bath or else he wouldn't be welcome to come back, anymore.
That was the last time we ever went to Ponderosa because George decided that his right to not take a bath was more important.
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