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Author
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Topic: Vampires
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Colin Wiseley
Expert Film Handler
Posts: 123
From: Blacksburg, VA
Registered: Dec 1999
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posted 08-08-2001 10:09 AM
Rating PG-13A vampire walks into a bar and the bartender says, "What can I get you?" The vampire replies, "A tall glass of blood." The bartender gets it, the vampire drinks it and walks out. A little while later another vampire walks into the bar and the bartender says, "What can I get you?" The vampire replies "A tall glass of blood." The bartender gets it, the vampire drinks it and walks out. A little while later a third vampire walks into the bar and the bartender says, "I bet you want a tall glass of blood." The vampire replies, "No, just get me a glass of hot water." The bartender then asks, "I'm surprised you just wanted water, the other vampires all wanted blood." The vampire then pulls out a used tampon and says "Tea."
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Bob Maar
(Maar stands for Maartini)
Posts: 28608
From: New York City & Newport, RI
Registered: Feb 2001
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posted 01-30-2003 09:31 AM
Rated PG ![[Eek!]](eek.gif) Jeff in Newport News
Two vampires wanted to go out to eat but were having a little trouble deciding where to go.They were a little tired of the local food in Transylvania and wanted some-thing a little more exotic.After some discussion, they decided to go to Italy because they had heard that Italian food was really good.
So off they went to Italy and ended up in Venice.On a bridge over one of the canals, they hid in the shadows and waited for dinner. A few minutes later they noticed a young couple walking their way. As they neared, the vampires made their move.Each vampire grabbed a person,sucked them dry,and tossed the remaining bodies into the canal below.
The vampires were extremely pleased with their meal and decided to have seconds. Another young couple approached a few minutes later and suffered the same fate as the first...sucked dry and tossed into the canal below!
Our vampires are now fairly full but decide to get dessert.In a short while a third young couple provides just that. As with the first two couples, these people were also sucked dry and tossed over the rail into the canal.
The vampires decided that they had a marvelous dinner.Now it was time to head back home to be sure to beat the sunrise.As they started to walk away, they began to hear some singing.They were puzzled because no one else was on the bridge.As they listened, they realized that it was coming from the canal. They looked over the rail and saw a big alligator in the water under the bridge, feasting on the bodies.They listened as the alligator sang:"Drained wops keep falling on my head!"
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