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Author Topic: A nice family Christmas...minus one Brad Miller Administrator Posts: 17775 From: Plano, TX (36.2 miles NW of Rockwall) Registered: May 99 posted 12-25-2005 04:20 PM                     I have just found out about a friend's Christmas celebration that is so wrong I just have to vent. A little background is required. We are talking about a guy who is still in college and living at home. He is a good kid. He doesn't do drugs, doesn't steal, he is never in any kind of trouble, all-in-all a son most every family would be proud of. This last summer his mother received an anonymous letter alerting her to the fact that her son was gay, and included a picture of him kissing his boyfriend to drive the point home. (Turns out the letter was in his ex-boyfriend's handwriting.) The mother freaked out and kicked him out of the house. He had to drop out of school. Forward in time a little ways and he was amazingly able to work things out with his mother enough so he could go back home. It was apparently a sort of "don't ask, don't tell" and most importantly "don't act on it" situation, but at least he was back with his family, right? Now forward in time to today, Christmas morning. The entire family, Grandma and all is there exchanging presents. Clothes, gift certificates and other various goods were given. My friend had to sit there with his family and watch as the pile of presents disappeared one by one only to find out that he received nothing. Yes, I said nothing. So here you have the entire family exchanging gifts and not a single present was addressed to him. To drive the point home, even the DOGS had presents waiting for them! What the fuck is wrong with some people? A merry Christmas indeed!  |  IP: Logged David Stambaugh Film God Posts: 4021 From: Eugene, Oregon Registered: Jan 2002 posted 12-25-2005 07:03 PM                        Sad story. The family should be ashamed.  |  IP: Logged Jamie Glossop Expert Film Handler Posts: 100 From: Nottingham Uk Registered: Jan 2004 posted 12-25-2005 07:21 PM                        As david said they should be very ashamed, How could his family do such a mean thing to him ,  |  IP: Logged Mathew Molloy Master Film Handler Posts: 357 From: The Santa Cruz Mountains Registered: Nov 2000 posted 12-25-2005 08:13 PM                     That is so messed up! Did the family members accept his gifts to them? How's he handling this/what's his response to being treated this way? I don't understand how an entire family can be so evil and hateful.  |  IP: Logged Louis Bornwasser Film God Posts: 4441 From: prospect ky usa Registered: Mar 2005 posted 12-25-2005 08:19 PM                        Man's inhumanity to man. Your friend is perhaps the most needing of the support of his family, not just at Christmas, but at all times. It has been my experience that lonliness and isolation are the worst part of being gay. (Close gay friends.) Louis  |  IP: Logged Phil Hill I love my cootie bug Posts: 7595 From: Hollywood, CA USA Registered: Mar 2000 posted 12-25-2005 08:50 PM                  Brad, I sincerely feel bad for your friend. Without getting too far up on my high horse and/or giving a sermon... this unfortunately happens far too often to many gay kids. Having worked for many years with 13-23 y/o gay street kids, and financially supported many thru available services, I know that story well. Many are kicked out by their "parents" simply because they announce or, as your friend, are outted. They have NO ONE to turn to and wind up homeless on the street. Many turn to the street and sell their bodies just to survive only to find themselves exploited, beat-up, or even killed. Many also succumb to drugs and yet others seem to enjoy the street lifestyle no matter how much help is available to them by both public and by sincere, non-exploitive individuals. It's a well-known fact that many gay kids commit suicide at a higher rate than the average rate or even kill to avoid being "outted". While your friend was "lucky" to have been taken "back in", his "family" NEEDS to learn how to forgive and about unconditional love...especially for their own flesh and blood. Even though he was "allowed" to be "re-admitted" to the family, they treat him like crap. Unfortunately, other than becoming a street kid, or some boy-toy to a sugardaddy, he has no other option but to put up with their crap until he has the means to support himself. The family supporting him and paying for his education is many times held over a kid's head for a reason to "be good" and renounce who they are. As was said before... how sad... how VERY sad. (OK, I'll get off my horse now!)  |  IP: Logged Frank Dubrois Jedi Master Film Handler Posts: 896 From: Cleveland, OH Registered: Mar 2005 posted 12-25-2005 08:57 PM                    His family is . He should find the means to leave. He shouldnt tell them anything...when he's leaving, where he's going, nothing. I doubt people like that would worry about him, but he doesn't need that. No one does.  |  IP: Logged Paul Mayer Oh get out of it Melvin, before it pulls you under! Posts: 3836 From: Albuquerque, NM Registered: Feb 2000 posted 12-25-2005 09:15 PM                        Some "family" huh? Hopefully the kid will find the inner strength it will take to move on without them. And sad as it sounds, he will be better off without them. I think I have a pretty good idea of what that kid must be going through. My so-called "family" did the same thing to me, though for other reasons. I wrote them out of my life years ago.  |  IP: Logged John McConnel Expert Film Handler Posts: 118 From: Okmulgee, OK USA Registered: Nov 2003 posted 12-25-2005 09:26 PM                        Brad, perhaps you and your friends could invite him into your circle, and give him friendship and emotional support. And encourage him to stay in school.  |  IP: Logged Emma Tomiak Expert Film Handler Posts: 238 From: Carrollton, TX, USA Registered: Aug 2003 posted 12-25-2005 11:29 PM                        That's just disgusting. Plain and simple. His family should be ashamed of themselves.  |  IP: Logged Richard Greco Phenomenal Film Handler Posts: 1180 From: Plant City, FL Registered: Nov 2003 posted 12-25-2005 11:30 PM                     Without brining my political beliefs in this, this is still VERY wrong. Regardless of him being "out", his family should still love him enough to have a nice christmas for him. That sucks......  |  IP: Logged Pravin Ratnam Jedi Master Film Handler Posts: 844 From: Atlanta, GA,USA Registered: Sep 2002 posted 12-26-2005 12:08 AM                     Even worse than disowning the kid was the intentional humiliation he had to endure. Something tells me that one of the reasons the mom took his son back in was to give her the opportunity to relieve some of her frustration about her son's gayness by keeping him closer and insulting him at times like this. I hope he didnt have a gift to give to the rest of the family members.  |  IP: Logged Phil Hill I love my cootie bug Posts: 7595 From: Hollywood, CA USA Registered: Mar 2000 posted 12-26-2005 12:11 AM                  quote: Richard Greco Without brining my political beliefs in this... Sorry Richard... but I cannot accept that horseshit! NO ONE cares! Your so called "disclaimer" is just plain stupid and ***offensive*** to many FT members...myself included!!!! While the rest of your post is "sensible", the 1st part is just plain asine! It's NOT a fucking political issue but a human rights issue.  |  IP: Logged Joe Redifer You need a beating today Posts: 12859 From: Denver, Colorado Registered: May 99 posted 12-26-2005 12:18 AM                        This is very wrong indeed. It is obvious this family knows little to nothing about unconditional love and instead is more worried about their reputation. Not giving gifts when even the dogs get them is just wrong. Knowing my confrontational nature, I would have been all over each of them asking the reason behind this. I would have demanded they state the reason right out in the open in front of everybody. It wouldn't have really helped the overall situation, but it would have at least made them accountable and I demand that everybody is accountable for their actions. Also, the guy who sent the picture to his mom also deserves an ass kicking. It is not his business when/if his boyfriend/ex-boyfriend decides to come out.  |  IP: Logged Lyle Romer Phenomenal Film Handler Posts: 1400 From: Davie, FL, USA Registered: May 2002 posted 12-26-2005 12:45 AM                     I can't believe that somebody's family would do something like that. It's one thing if they don't approve of his lifestyle but to go out of their way to embarrass him and make him feel like an outcast is reprehensible. Agree with Phil on the political part. We may (and probably do) have very different politics but this is a human issue and I hope I speak for all on my side of the aisle when I say that his family is complete trash and deserves to rot in hell.  |  IP: Logged

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