Dirty money

[Frank Cox]

A guy paid for his popcorn with $5 in quarters. I threw the quarters into the cash drawer as usual and afterward every time I opened the cash drawer the smell of stale cigarette smoke was just about enough to knock me over.

It was those quarters, stinking to high heaven.

They were by now mixed in with the other quarters in the drawer so after I started the show I took all of the quarters and put them into a container with soap and water to soak. I'll set them out to dry tomorrow.

Sheesh. I've never seen coins stink like that. I've had the odd coin come in that was sticky or something and I've had to wash that off but this whole bunch of quarters smelling of smoke that heavily is a first. I never knew coins could take on a smell like that.

I took dirty money tonight and now I'm laundering it.

[Randy Stankey]

Metal has no smell by itself but, when it reacts with other things, the reaction products can have a smell. Even oil from the fingers can react with the copper plating on a penny, causing it to give off that characteristic "old penny" smell.

I'm betting that the nicotine (and other substances in cigarette smoke) reacted with the nickel in the coins, creating an even stronger smell.

Wash the coins in detergent like Dawn or similar product containing sodium laurel sulfate. Rinse well with clear water then put them in a dilute solution of hydrochloric acid. You can use muriatic acid purchased from the hardware store, diluted 50/50 with water. After soaking for five minutes or so, drain and rinse super duper well with water then dry. If you don't have or don't want to go buy HCl, you can use acetic acid, better known as white vinegar. Use it straight from the bottle. Commercial white vinegar is usually only 5% concenteration. Use the same process.

That's the same process we would use in the plating shop. It works for steel and other hard metals like nickel but DON'T use it on copper or other soft metals. Especially not on aluminum!

That's how I would launder my money.

[Frank Angel]

I have an unusually keen sense of smell and I find the odor of burned cigarette buts to be particularly noxious. Of course the rule of the land in the projection booths in NYC by edict of the Motion Picture Operators Licence and the NYC Building Code is NO SMOKING in the booth at anytime under pain of your gonads and ahole getting painted with Ultra Hot Tabasco Pepper Sauce. One of the booths in the big theatre also houses one of three followspots and so with rock and roll shows or ballets, etc, we have to hire freelance followspot operators who may not be aware that I am somewhere in the theatre with a paint brush and a can of Tabasco sauce, and they will sneak a smoke. And I understand, operating a followspot for 3 hours without a break is not easy if you are a nicotine addict. But then when you pick up your sorry butt to leave the booth, take your Marlborough butts with you! DON'T try to hide the evidence somewhere in the booth, because the Chief Projectionist will be up there the next day and will be able to smell your stinking butts.

So the next day I am running a movie angry enough that my Italian Vendetta Vein is quite prominent and visible on my forehead because I can't escape that tell-tale, totally in-my-nose butt stink no matter where I am in the booth. But I can't find the source of the stench, so there I am wandering around the booth which is fairly large with 3 projectors and a followspot, sniffing like a police narcotics dog trying to find the contraband. Sure enough after a much too much of my time spent with my nose in places I shouldn't need to put it, I find these butts hidden under the radiator behind the followspot. After much ranting, I put that stagehand on the list of people never to hire again. Of course we did hire him again because good followspot operators are hard to find, and hell, tell the projectionist to get over it. That's right; i get no respect.

[Leo Enticknap]

At one theater I worked back in the '90s, we had a constant problem with people smoking in the restrooms, thereby triggering the smoke detectors, an evacuation drill, and a round of lost shows and refunds.

This got so bad that eventually we installed high pressure sprinklers above the toilets in each of the cubicles, and had the alarm system programmed such that a 30-second cold shower would be delivered if the smoke detector in that restroom was triggered, and the system would only proceed to an evacuation alarm if smoke was still being detected afterwards. It only took two or three occasions when customers emerged from the restroom, totally drenched (the first went meowing and hissing to the local newspaper, and her threats to sue us ensured city-wide knowledge of what would happen if you tried to smoke in our restroom cubicles), to end the problem permanently.

[Tony Bandiera Jr]

On the subject of smells...

I collect racing Jerseys from motocross and Supercross racers. Most of the time they give them to me after a race or practice sessions, and sometimes they smell pretty bad.

At one Supercross race many years ago, on Breast Cancer Awareness night (Nicknamed the "Save the Tah-Tahs Race") , It was announced that the riding gear (Jerseys and pants) of ALL 20 of the riders in the main event were to be auctioned off on fleabay , with the proceeds to go to the Susan Komen Breast Cancer Foundation. The gear was also autographed.

I bid on five sets and won three. It was a total of well over $800 but to a good cause. Two of the riders were teammates. When I got the gear I was pretty surprised to discover that the gear was AS-WORN, right off the riders after the race. Sweat, dirt, and smells were all there. The two teammates' gear had, to be blunt about it, the same pit funk, which puzzled me at first. As teammates, they were on the same diets, so that explained that. But it was kinda strong, and so I couldn't really display them.

I contacted a guy who sells memorabilia and mentioned my dilemma. He told me the story of a kid who got an NFL Playoff game ball, autographed by the winning team. Evidently, (and I never knew this) game balls get pretty nasty and smelly. (There's a very bad joke in there, but let it slide...) His mom, tired of the smell in his room, decided to carefully clean the ball to get rid of the smell. Despite not ruining the signatures, that action devalued that ball all the way down to about $50, from the original value in the high thousands.

So he told me to decide what was more important to me..keeping the value and authenticity of the gear, with the dirt and smells proving it was actually worn in a major event, or washing them so they smell nice and look pretty.

To this day, they haven't been washed, and thankfully the smells have diminished. (Until the humidity rises, they they stink again.)

[Bobby Henderson]

Aside from what can happen to coins, paper money can get pretty filthy too -even laced with bacteria. I've seen convenience stores put up signs stating "no sock money and no bra money." I've even seen it phrased, "no titty money." It wouldn't surprise me if some jack-asses folded their cash and put it in their ass cracks. It's amazing how disgusting people can be.

[Martin McCaffery]

How about No Stripper Money

[Frank Angel]

Tony -- display them in airtight plastic bags. Keep the stink; let them look purdy. Besides, you don't want people toughing a museum-level artifact anyway.

As for,

At one Supercross race many years ago, on Breast Cancer Awareness night (Nicknamed the "Save the Tah-Tahs Race")

I am surprised there was no outrage about that nickname. In this day and (Me To) age, that nickname probably would engender an uproar of protest. You know...cause no one can take a joke anymore.

[Leo Enticknap]

A film professor at a college campus on which I installed a projector a few weeks ago told me that he was the subject of an official complaint as the result of including Pulp Fiction in one of his classes. The little snowflake objected to be exposed to racism (given that there are something like 350 utterances of the n-word in that movie, unsurprisingly), glorifying gun violence, homophobia (the cellar scene) and transphobia (the Tarantino as house husband character). Thankfully he was tenured, so his job wasn't at risk, but he was still ordered to apologize to the student and not to use that movie in his classes ever again.

[Frank Angel]

[Tony Bandiera Jr]

Tony -- display them in airtight plastic bags. Keep the stink; let them look purdy. Besides, you don't want people toughing a museum-level artifact anyway.

As for, I am surprised there was no outrage about that nickname. In this day and (Me To) age, that nickname probably would engender an uproar of protest. You know...cause no one can take a joke anymore.

Call me weird (since I am) but I never really minded the smells. As a racer myself, I am used to them. It just surprised me as these were all up for public auction. OTOH, since I am willing to bet that only fans of the sport were willing to bid that much money on them (the big names gear went for in excess of 10 grand!), I am willing to bet they also didn't care about the smell. Being single, I also have no one in the house to complain about them.

As for that race nickname, you are 100% correct. Thankfully that was in the early 2000's (around 2007 IIRC) so people weren't as sensitive then. The new gen would have a heart attack... the girls collecting money in jeweled and fuzzy pink mx boots (thankfully NOT worn, those get disgusting) had on short shorts, and tops that amply showed their assets (AKA Ta-Tas.) Even as a gay guy, I thought they looked hot. And there was NO SHAME in that. I think I dropped 5 20's in those boots that night.

A film professor at a college campus on which I installed a projector a few weeks ago told me that he was the subject of an official complaint as the result of including Pulp Fiction in one of his classes. The little snowflake objected to be exposed to racism (given that there are something like 350 utterances of the n-word in that movie, unsurprisingly), glorifying gun violence, homophobia (the cellar scene) and transphobia (the Tarantino as house husband character). Thankfully he was tenured, so his job wasn't at risk, but he was still ordered to apologize to the student and not to use that movie in his classes ever again.

Was that the one I used to work at? Sounds like the typical "student" there. Whatever happened to the idea that colleges were supposed to be about free thinking, and exploration of all races, cultures, genders (there are only two BTW), and sexual orientations? My time at that University was the worst as far as uptight, close-minded people. The mx track (a hyper-hetero hotbed) NEVER gave me any grief EVEN AFTER a certain rider outed me. Even the military, pre "Don't ask, Don't tell" was more chill about it. EVEN today, most people are more open than that place was in the late 90's-early 2000's.

Off topic, but need to know: How are you guys able to get multiple quotes showing correctly in your posts? I have to manually put in names for additional quotes in my replies. If it makes a difference, I am on Firefox and Winblows 11. EDITED TO ADD: I started a new thread on this question so we won't derail this one.